Racing with the Roadies

This weekend I made the trip to Kenmare for the 2010 Humpty Dumpty Duathlon. This was the second year this event was run and it had competitors cycle 40km up through the Kerry mountain roads through the infamous Molls Gap followed by a 6km run around the outskirts of the village. Tom Elliott got talked into entering by his friend Donal a.k.a. Dermot, who in turn invited myself and Hefner. I had never raced any kind of road race or triathlon type event before but I have been running quite a bit this year so I thought it might be a laugh, especially with the promise of a night out in Kenmare afterwards.

I don't own a road bike or even a hardtail that could be pedaled so I had to borrow a bike from Grif. Its kind of mad that I have 3 bikes and none of them in any way suitable for this kind of race but Grif's Lappierre Tecnic 700 fitted the bill nicely, especially when you throw a set of 1.5 slicks on. Myself and Hefner travelled up early Saturday morning and set up the bikes in the carpark near the finish area.

122 competitors met at the Brooklane Hotel where we registered and got our safety briefing. We were warned that there could be leaves on some sections of the road and that there was some nasty crosswinds that could knock you off your bike, very scary stuff. We got going on the parade lap of the town just before 12 noon and the race began with a rolling start as we passed by the hotel. As normal, I took off flat out and burnt myself out before too long. I had a lot of confused roadies throwing me dirty looks as i spent the first few kilometers out of the saddle trying to keep up with the chasing pack. It didn't last too long and I had to sit down and find a rhythm on the climb up to Molls Gap and was passed by around 15 roadies with a smug look on their faces, fuckers. Once I got beyond Molls Gap the downhill sections began and I thought I would flake along here and catch some of the lads who passed me. Big mistake, the road bikes proved to be much faster on these sections too but I was able to tuck in behind a group of 6 who towed me along for around 10k. It was some buzz riding along in a pack at that pace, taking turns to take the lead and take the sting out of the wind. We came to a sharp left hander with a marshal waving at us to slow down, screw that, off the brakes and cut in tight and I dropped the bunch of roadies and took off up a steep climb where the mountain bike seemed to have an advantage.

By now I had realized that there was only one mountain bike in front of me, as I was the only one dumb enough to ride up the front at the start and only one lad had passed me. An old dude came flying up behind me so I jumped in behind him and we started picking off riders in front of us including the guy on the mountain bike, delighted. I managed to stay with older dude until about 5k from the end, my legs were buckled and didn't have the gas even to stay behind in the slipstream. I knew the run was going to be murder.

I had to dismount at the change over area where I changed my shoes and ditched the helmet and backpack. My legs were like jelly once I started running, way worse than I expected. I was relieved to see I wasn't the only one suffering with others in front of me having to stop and walk. I kept the head down and plugged away and the legs felt a bit more normal after around 3k. I crossed the line in 50th position with a time of 1.51.57 where I met Donal who had kicked ass and finished in 23rd position in his first race of this kind.

Hefner followed in behind in 85th position after making up a lot of positions on the run. Im pretty sure he was the only competitor on a full suspension bike, not exactly ideal for a road race! He had passed Tom who died a horrible death on the run after a good cycle, and was seen trying to thumb a lift from a passing tractor.

After a quick feed and wash we took off to sample the Kenmare pubs, and kept sampling until we somehow ended up in the park throwing chips at each other and worked on our wrestling techniques.

It was a brilliant day out, both for the event and the night out that followed. I wouldn't be too surprised to find myself wheezing up at Molls gap next year.

http://www.thehumptydumpty.com/

What Saturdays are made for

At the start of the year i decided i was going to make a big effort to figure out this dirt jumping lark, and things were starting to go well with the construction of the dirt jumps in Tracton. The standard and expectations moved up a notch when the Whistler pickled Nugget came home for a few months and we started some resurrecting work on the pump track and dirt jumps at Kevs gaff. This area had seen some tasty work over the few years with the help of Alfred, Quinn and Sean Swanick, to name a few. We set out reshaping the track and lips and before long the first two jumps were rideable but proved much more technical than I had anticipated due to the berm on the run in to the first jump. Since then, there has been work done to get more of the line open to get some continuity going. There isn't a straight jump in the set, with a berm either before or after each jump forcing you to get comfortable moving the bike around in the air when landing into a berm to maximize your speed for the next jump. It feels like a big pump track and although the jumps are not that big, I am usually smiling from ear to ear after each run. Just to clarify before I go any further, this is on private land and is on an invite only basis. The last thing anyone wants is strangers turning up at their front garden unannounced.

So, Saturday saw me finish work reasonably early and i met Jakob at the jumps around 3pm. It was a bit of a last minute decision to go ride there so we didn't put the word out about it. We weren't there long when Miley Murphy of Weldon Suspension showed up with some of his buddies, most of which had never seen the place before. These lads were mad eager to have a go at the jumps and seemed pretty confident about being able to ride the jump line as they were well used to the jumps in Tracton. The jumps in Tracton may be of similar size but its a whole different story when you start throwing berms and rollers into the equation. The penny dropped after the lads took a few runs at them and were coming up well short of clearing the first jump. The fact that most of them had full suspension rigs with knobbly tyres did nothing to help their cause but in fairness, they tried away mad and as the day went on they were getting closer and closer as they figured out the berm and got comfortable hitting the line with more pace.

A few familiar faces showed up during the day including Larry Douglas who popped in on the way back from an adventure race in West Cork. Greg O'Keeffe had a lash off the pumptrack and seemed to spend more than half of it on the back wheel, manualling everything at high speed. Next to arrive was Denis Corkery with two of the Cornforths in tow, Cam and Luke. The two lads had downhill bikes with them but it only took them a run or two before they had the first two jumps dialed, pedaling at every opportunity to keep up the speed. Even with a bit of teasing, Cam could not clear the third jump with his bike robbing all his speed in the berm before it. They spend the rest of their time there hitting a huge jump that Rob Davis had carved out of a pile of dirt alongside the pumptrack. They were getting massive air off it, making it look way too easy. Denis got the balls of the day award with his attempts at the jump line on a borrowed bmx, flaking at it in much the same way way Rob does, low and fast. He did well to come away with only a few minor falls. The same could not be said for one of Mileys friends who managed to pitch himself over the bars when he landed the first jump short. It was a worst case scenario crash and he was very lucky to walk away from it, and a bit of a reality check for the rest of us.

Since i have been riding there, i don't think i have seen a day where there was so many riders out to learn and have a go off something new. It really spurred you on and the more that showed up, the better i found myself riding as i tried to keep up. Everybody left with a smile and most with some unfinished business and eagerness for another lash of it. Its what Saturdays are made for, riding dirt jumps with a bunch of like minding loonies.

Vee Virgin

I had heard great reports from lads in the club (MBCC) about a spin around the "Vee" out in the Knockmealdown mountains. What was promised was rough rocky open mountains with some savage downhills so it was hard to ignore the advertised spin on the club website.

With my bike out of action I borrowed a hardtail off Fred, an On-One Inbred which i was told "could be held together with bits of coke cans". A quick inspection later and after replacing some missing bolts and lobbing on some Minions, she was ready to rock.

Myself and Hefner hit the road in my car and met up with Scully, Brian, Eoin T, Jakob, Kimjongil and PHD where we shuttled to the top of the mountain in some cars and left the others at the bottom in Clogheen.

From what I understand, we did a figure of eight around the mountains. The first loop was the shorter of the 2 with a handy enough climb followed by a fun descent. A long enough drag back up the road took us back to the carpark where started the second loop up a really technical steep climb. The single ring on freds bike broke me on this climb and I had to ride it with a "flat out or stop" approach where I would blaze past everyone only to be passed again while I tried to keep my breakfast down, gasping for breath on the side of the track. Every nasty bit of that climb was worth it for downhills that followed. The first of which was down a steep boggy side of the mountain where it was recommended you avoid the beaten track and find your own way down, off piste. Out with the allen keys and down with saddle and away we went. I took it fairly slow and steady and still barely made it down without being pitched over the bars.

The next downhill was fuckin nuts. As Eoin put it, " your booting along over the rocks thinking this is rough as hell and then you hit the rock garden". It was the roughest track i have ever ridden, worse than anything in Alp d'Huez, the home of the Mega Avalanche. Freds poor hardtail got the shit kicked out of it (sorry fred) but luckily most of his parts including his wheels were off a downhill bike. Lots of smiles and stories at the end of that section. A short hike a bike later and we came to a split on the track where you had a choice of routes, one of which was down a chute with massive loose rocks everywhere, no sign of ground below them either. Myself and Eoin took this route which I started to regret once I got going on it, it was much harder than it looked but there was no stopping once you got going. Very relieved to make it down in one piece. There was a flat out section down a smooth enough track next, into the tuck position racing each other to the bottom.

The final downhill was unreal too, very loose and rocky again but this time there was a few switchbacks thrown in for good measure. I chased Jakob down it with old man Scully roaring at me from behind. There was some honk of burning brakes coming from my Hopes, which were fairly rubbish to be honest but that could have been due to set up. Wont be rushing out to buy a pair after the days biking.

We made our way to the Lucky Leprechaun Pub in Clogheen afterwards for a well deserved pint of the black stuff and a few more of PHD's twisted jokes.

Thanks to Eoin and Scully for the guided tour, looking forward to another lash of it soon.

Stan